Tuesday, October 9, 2007

SitCom: Situation Complicated 2

DISCLAIMER: All characters, names, situations, and places used are purely fictitious. They are written for the purposes of enlightenment, criticism, and/or sheer entertainment. Any similarity to real people is simply coincidence. So get off my case already.

Situation Complicated: (Note: This is clearly addressed to the men). The president of the company finally calls you by your real name, and not just a spin-off or something that rhymes with it. You couldn't be more psyched. Actually, you are because he just asked you to go to a strip club with him one night after work, you know, to unwind (perv). What do you tell him?

A) "Sure, you're the boss!"
B) "I would want nothing more than a lap dance right about now, but my wife/girlfriend is ovulating (or not, whichever you prefer, of course) so I better run along. Definitely a raincheck."
C) I'll make this an easy one and leave it to just two options. So you guys don't have to ponder on it too long, geez.

Answer: Well, a giveaway; that's a B, of course. But this is actually a trick question, because you must NEVER take a raincheck on something like that, you sleaze bag. Next time you get the urge to splurge on some smutty strip tease extravaganza, why don't you ask your significant other to come with you, or hint that THEY strip for YOU. Without the boss, of course. If you think the idea of it will scare her off, try to break it to her gently. Start by reading dirty magazines together, you know, the ones you read for the "articles." And so on and so forth.

It's one thing to play ball with the boys or go solo on a road trip to "get away." But strip clubs? Come on. Give your girls a reason to be bad sometimes -- they might just like it, too.

1 comment:

Zooomabooma said...

I went to a strip club once. Wasn't by choice. Was with a bunch of people who were friends at the time. No lap dances and I must say -- it was so lame. I'm not sure why men get a kick out of them when real personal human interaction in a bedroom is 17,000% better!!!

I wouldn't want to lie to anyone but get out of going to a strip club I would. Or I would just tell 'em strip clubs are stupid and if there are consequences of my words then so be it!